Alternative Candidates
Is Barack too controversial for your taste? Is McCain too temperamental? Do senators make you yawn? As the first Tuesday in November draws ever closer, some voters may feel stuck between a rock and a hard place. Don’t fret. A dozen alternative candidates are flying under the radar. You may never have heard of the following presidential nominees, but they could use all the votes they can get.
The Seasoned Veteran
If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again…and then again three more times. The name Ralph Nader should sound familiar, given that he has campaigned for the presidency in every election since 1992. Running on the Independent Party ticket, the 78-year-old attorney is credited with aiding George W.’s wins by pulling votes from constituents who would have otherwise supported the Democratic nominees. Issues important to this contender in his fifth election include ending the over-consumption of fossil fuels and shifting the power from the government back into the hands of consumers. Here’s to persistence.
The Ex-Republican
Considered at one time to be one of the most conservative members of congress, Robert “Bob” Barr is running on the Libertarian ticket. After leaving Congress in 2003, Barr vocally opposed the Bush administration, eventually denouncing the Republican Party and becoming Libertarian. His claims to fame include being photographed licking whipped cream off a woman’s chest at a charity event and a cameo in “Borat,” as himself. The candidate aims to reduce government spending and gun control laws. However, he may do nothing more than siphon votes from Republican nominee, John McCain.
The Reverend
Charles “Chuck” Baldwin, a Baptist pastor and radio talk-show host by trade, is running under the banner of the Constitution Party. Pro-life, pro-traditional marriage, and anti-gun control, Baldwin plans to remove the United States from the U.N. if he wins the election. The self-proclaimed “real deal” also plans on returning the U.S. to the gold standard and just might steal a few votes from McCain.
The Tupac Fan
Good news for the environmentalists: former Georgia Congresswoman Cynthia Ann McKinney has more name recognition than any past Green Party presidential candidate. After picking up one-tenth of a percent of the popular vote in 2004, the Green Party could use all the help it can get. During her former days in Congress, McKinney presented a bill to make all records relating to rapper Tupac Shakur’s death public. Don’t expect Tupac awareness to be on her presidential platform, though. McKinney is more interested in federal investment in low-income families and Hurricane Katrina survivor recognition.
Although the intentions and sanity of these candidates may be debatable, they deserve credit for withstanding the heat of the proverbial presidential election kitchen. Advice for these vote-seekers: don’t start filling out change-of-address forms for 1600 Pennsylvania Avenue just yet.
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